Tomorrow is Thanksgiving in America and we’re traditionally supposed to give thanks for all we’re grateful for.
But I want to give thanks today, to YOU, for being a dear and loyal reader.
Whether you’ve been with me for a few years or a few days, thank you.
Whether you “get” me or not, thank you.
It’s not easy spilling your heart and soul out on the internet, publicly opening yourself up to ridicule, criticism and judgment from anyone and everyone who happens to stumble upon your words.
In a way, it’s like going to a concert, standing up on stage and talking about the most vulnerable parts of you. On a smaller scale, can you imagine going to work on Monday and in the middle of a meeting, looking around the conference room table and telling your colleagues, bosses and coworkers that you feel like you’re failing as a mother because you can’t seem to get through to your teenage daughter… or you’re not a good enough partner because you don’t have the energy to “get in the mood” most nights… or you’re falling short as a human being because you’re not fulfilling what you came here to do and you don’t even know what that is?
Can you express those feelings out loud to people around you? Many of us can’t even talk about it to those we love, let alone people we know casually who think we’ve got it together, and those we don’t know.
But when you have a blog, you put it all out there.
What’s the point of writing if you’re not going to reach deep within your soul and pull out both the shameful and beautiful truth? Anything less is YAWN.
And the readers who keep coming back for more – the ones who resonate with who you are, the ones who have a-ha moments within themselves after reading your words, the ones who shift internally because of something you expressed – are the reasons you do it, and continue to do it.
So thank YOU, beautiful reader, for keeping me honest. For keeping me going… and growing.
As you grow, I grow. And as I grow, my words grow.
I’ve come to realize that my words no longer fit within the sole focus of high sensitivity, empaths and emotions. My Find Your Inner Happy website was built solely for highly sensitive women who struggle with their emotions. Throughout the years, others have found their way here too… men, non-binary, non-HSP, democrats, republicans, teenagers, retirees and those outside the circle of focus who seem to resonate with my words.
I’m grateful to have been able to touch so many lives, regardless of my initial niche.
In the past year, I’ve been struggling with an autoimmune disorder that has caused, among many things, constant hives.
My doctors kept giving me medication to control them, from topical creams to oral prescriptions. And at first, I used them because it itched so badly I just wanted them to go away, even though I’m not a big believer in meds. My desperate desire to stop itching overruled my resistance to taking meds.
But then, I realized something.
Taking meds to stop the hives and itching only takes care of the symptoms, not the root cause. But the symptoms caused so much grief, I didn’t care. I just wanted the burning and itching to go away because I was scratching in my sleep until I bled and waking up with cuts and welts. The root cause was invisible, it was the symptoms that was more pressing and demanded attention.
In the same way, taking my course to learn how to manage your emotions is only resolving the symptoms, not the root cause. But the symptoms (overwhelming emotions, outbursts of anger, gripping anxiety and fear, immense sadness, for example) cause so much grief, people don’t care. They just want the pain to go away because that’s more pressing than the root cause in the moment of the emotional overwhelm. The root cause, however, like my disorder, is invisible; it’s the emotional outburst that demands attention.
Do you see the correlation?
People take my course to learn how to manage their overwhelming emotions. And it works.
I took prescription meds to manage my hives. And it worked.
Nothing wrong with alleviating symptoms that are causing you grief.
But what about the source? What’s causing the overwhelming emotions for you? What’s causing the hives for me?
Trying to deal with your emotions each time they come up is like putting lotion on your hives. You’re alleviating the symptom but what about the cause?
Sometimes, though, we need to focus on alleviating our symptoms before we can focus on getting to the source because the symptoms are too painful and we need a clear mind and clearer energy to be able to put our attention on what’s deeply important. I totally get that. When I was itching, I couldn’t concentrate on anything else except trying not to scratch. So take the course or rub the cream on, do what you need to do to clear up your energy so you can then focus below the itchy surface. The course, like the meds, is simply step one. Step two is going beyond the surface.
After my hives were soothed, I went deeper, beyond the hives, beyond the symptoms, and I realized something profound.
Let me paint a picture…
You don’t feel right in this world. Everywhere you look, things appear wrong. From our appointed leaders who are supposed to have our best interests in mind but clearly don’t, to our societal conditioning that says you have to work hard to pay the bills until you can retire and hopefully live long enough after to enjoy some freedom, to the way people treat others, it just all feels WRONG. You can feel it within you.
You know inherently that life is supposed to be better, people should be kinder, children shouldn’t be starving, the world should be more balanced, but your eyes see the opposite. There’s dissonance with what you see outside and what you feel inside.
And then you start to wonder, maybe YOU’RE wrong. If everyone else seems to be okay with it, maybe it’s just you?
So you walk around every day being pulled and torn and having the sense that everything is upside down, wrong side up, but no one else seems to notice, and when you scroll through your Facebook feed and read things that are going on in this world, it feels so. very. wrong.
Then someone slows on their brakes a little too hard on the road in front of you or takes a little too long in the grocery store line and you have an angry outburst or a sobbing meltdown.
If you deal with your outburst in that moment by letting it flow or releasing it using the techniques I teach in my course, you’re only releasing AN EXPRESSION of the pain you feel deep down.
You’re only releasing a symptom in the moment. You feel better, but you’re not getting to the cause, the root of that pain. You’re only soothing the hive.
So what’s the deeper, underlying problem? It’s not the hive or the emotional outburst, that’s just a symptom – a surface level problem.
You know that feeling you’ve had your whole life, even as a child who couldn’t quite explain or express it, that there’s something more to this world, more in this life, more for YOU? You ever feel like you’re missing something? Like everyone’s missing something?
Like there’s something we’re just not getting. Something bigger. More meaningful. Unexplained. Mysterious. Invisible.
We run around distracted, worried about this, trying to achieve that, chasing shiny objects and getting them only to discover they’re just gold-plated and the insides of them are tarnished. So we look for more shiny objects to chase thinking they’re the real deal only to get disappointed again when we find them. And we run around in circles over and over and over again. Similar relationships, same triggers. Everyone says they have the answer and you try them all but nothing ever works. Not for long anyway… because they too are selling soothing lotions for the symptoms.
Ah, yes. I know something’s percolating inside for you now.
During my healing journey, I awakened to the cause, the source of my hives. And I’m happy to announce, they’re gone. Just like that. No more meds, lotions or creams.
Wanna know what the source is?
I’ll tell you.
But not today.
Because YOU have the answer inside you. You don’t need me to tell you what you already know. In my healing journey, I sought out psychics, spiritual advisors and energy healers along with traditional western-medicine doctors. Some of them helped tremendously. Some of them were a waste of time. In the end, I decided to go against the advice of all of them and went deeper inside me to find the answers.
I wish to impart this onto you, dear reader. YOU have all the answers you need inside you. Not inside your EGO, but inside YOU – your soul… that YOU deep within that’s been with you your entire life, watching, observing, nudging… loving. Go deeper, beyond that part of you that feels emotions, beyond self-righteousness, shame, pain, doubt and fear. Even beyond self-worth, confidence and pride. Those are human emotions. Go deeper, into your soul.
Feel like someone’s been silently, invisibly observing you your whole life? Yes – this someone… that something… whoever or whatever it is… go deeper, introduce yourself to them, even though they already know you, have always known you and will always know you.
Next week, I’ll share with you my profound discovery and new adventure.
But first, I invite you to take the time to discover your truth for yourself. It might be different than mine. It might be the same. But until then, I leave you with two Rumi quotes:
“That which is false troubles the heart. But truth brings joyous tranquility.” ~ Rumi
“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I’ll meet you there.” ~ Rumi
See you in that field, beautiful soul.
In love and light,